Round 2 Day 15

I've talked a lot about the constant changing nature of how I feel physically.  Here's a little example of that from the past 24 hours.  Yesterday I felt pretty good most of the day.  I was able to eat fairly normally, I got up and walked around a bit, I had some people visit me and I was able to hang out and talk with them without too much trouble.  It was a good day.  Then last night around bed time I started feeling this intense pain in my lower back.  It turns out I hadn't really pooped for most of the week and at a certain point that just adds up to pure pain.  Being in the hospital and on a bunch of different medications apparently creates such issues for me.  So I spend most of the night trying different things and suffering through this pain, and then this morning I win that battle.  Then, an hour or so later I start feeling queasy (just as my breakfast arrives of course) and promptly throw up.  And I'm thinking that some of the ultra-laxative that I drank down last night must have still been in my stomach and made me sick.  Because it's not the usual nausea I've been having, it's a bit different.  But I'm not really sure.  And I've already taken my morning dose of nausea and pain medication so I talk to my nurse and ask her for a different nausea medication and some tylenol in the hopes that combination will have some positive affect on my stomach's delicate balance.  You get the idea.  I'm telling you, it's something new all the time, can't get bored!

The nice thing though is that I've made some progress this week on understanding how to deal with the various discomforts of chemotherapy.  I've realized that I do need some pain medication at times.  There's no reason to sit around suffering when I could be in less pain.  And every time I receive more treatments I learn more about how I react to them and what to expect.  So it's a good learning process, and I'm feeling more and more comfortable with it, and less disoriented and blind-sided by everything.

My white blood cell counts have come way up today, so there's a fair chance I'll get to go home today.  Just have to wait for the doctor to look at my numbers and make the call.

I wanted to take a moment here to thank some friends who helped me move yesterday.  When I realized how the chemotherapy treatment process I'm going through would affect my life I decided it would be best to get rid of my apartment and stay with my parents for a while.  Thankfully I was able to get out of my lease without too much trouble, and staying with my folks is proving to be really wonderful.  My parents are taking really excellent care of me and it's just nice to have their love and support and presence nearby through this.  Yesterday I asked some friends to help move my stuff out of my apartment and down to my parents' place.  I am stuck in the hospital, I can't contribute to the move at all, and I was completely at the mercy of whatever others were willing to do to help me out.  I am so incredibly appreciative of those of you who were able to help out yesterday.  Thank you for everything.  And thanks to those of you who were able to stop by afterwards and cheer me up :)  I love you guys, you're amazing.

This is just a small example of the kindness and support people have been showing me.  I've talked about it a lot.  It means so much to me, and it is actually one of the most powerfully healing things I've experienced.  Thanks to all of you for the love.